[tmtranscripts] Abraham 11-19-01

[ellen]

MEETING WITH ABRAHAM & EMULAN -- LESSON CHANGE
NOVEMBER 19, 2001
WOODS CROSS GROUP

I am ABRAHAM. Greetings. I thank you for your all-inspiring discussion this
evening. With such wisdom in the room, what need have you of a teacher? I am
the one who is learning. What an honor it has been to serve this planet lo
these many years. The changing times are quite astounding to me. The
evolving minds of mortals helps us to know that Father is real and ever
striving for our wellness.

I am contemplating changing tonight's lesson in order to meet the needs of
the group. Your daringness to be your true selves with one another is
beautiful to behold. I give you EMULAN.

Greetings, friends. It has been awhile since we have been together. I can
remember in my mortal existence how I dreamed of a particular life pattern,
a pattern that seemed to be the most common in mortal living. I worked. I
married. I fathered a child. I was always intrigued by what was most popular
in that day and age. I put forth most of my energy into living my plan of
that mortal pattern. I had goals to meet, expectations to fulfill.

I spent very little time just in the comfort of knowing that I was already
blessed and watched over. There was always this life-striving. The striving
took tremendous amounts of energy and I was forcing my life plan of action.
I thought this to be true and good. I thought this to be a comfortable
reality. I indeed overlooked those things most precious, yes.

I did however experience a terrible awakening when I discovered the loss of
my wife and daughter. The experience was unbearable. I knew thoroughly every
mortal emotion anyone could ever experience, anger, despair, confusion and
loneliness. I hated God for allowing this to happen to me. How unfair was
this mortal life. I cared not about valuable lessons. I did not arise to
meet the challenge, no.

I deserted any spiritual light that was trying to reach me. From that there
was a continuing downward spiral into insanity. Yes, I was broken. I felt
damaged beyond repair. The reality of living with a constant ache and
longing had completely taken me away from those spiritual guardians who were
trying to assist. Time did pass and I had completely given up and was
institutionalized.

The days went by and everything I had ever believed in, or thought was
important, faded away from me. Yes, I was empty. In my broken state, in my
releasing, trying to make sense of everything, I heard these words: "Fear
not, my son, for in every dark moment I am with you. I seek to give you
light and a new life. I have always loved you and I always will." This was a
parting of the clouds. This was my first rays of hope and healing.

Do you see? I had to be stripped of my old, unusable ideas. I did not hear
the voice of help until I was completely silenced. I had to face the truth
about myself, the way I lived and pursued meaningless things. I felt guilt
and had tremendous self-loathing. I did receive wonderful psychiatric
assistance, but that could never have pulled my soul from the depth of
despair. I did not at first believe Father could help me. I felt I was left
behind to be punished for my actions.

Time is the most difficult teacher, but in time came healing and
understanding, and I learned our Father was truly merciful and kind, truly
all-knowing and all-powerful. I never expected to be a whole person again,
but as experience had shown me, Father beat my expectations. I became
interested in the inter-workings of the mind and was educated and became a
doctor of psychiatry.

I feel my practice was so much more than it could have been had I not
experienced what I did. I did not forget my family, no. I continued to work
on my issues with guilt and regrets of choosing meaningless priorities. The
work was ongoing. The work was then managed by a spiritual team, individuals
I could not see, but nonetheless viewed the fruits in my life daily.

I had often wondered if these circumstances were destined to be or were they
only accidents of time. I came to the conclusion that it did not matter and
I have today. I will experience pain, no doubt, but I will also know joy and
comfort beyond my comprehension.

Time may have its way with you, but Father may have His way with time. Do
not flee from the light as I had. Do not mistrust those who have hung the
stars. Do not forget that the one who dwells within knows your every desire
and seeks your happiness. He also seeks to be at one with you someday and
will minister to you in a way that leads you to Him. I leave you to ABRAHAM.

My children, my friends, my co-workers, I do know firsthand this mortal
despair and I can vow to you that you will receive perfect understanding in
time, and it will seem as if these ways of life were always meant to be.

Concentrate this week on allowing spiritual evolution to unfold. Push not
the mortal design, but allow yourself the freedom of relying not on your own
understanding. The comfort is there. The light is there. You cannot flee
your mortal lessons, but you can receive fantastic enhancement from them.
You can take off the sharp edges of pain to allow a spiritual definition. I
am uplifted by your willingness to carry on, to face disappointment, to walk
away from upheaval and rebuild.

I am sorry--no questions, but I will be back next week. Until then know that
your friends and teachers are numberless. My love goes with you. Shalom.